Learning around the Curve!

Published January 14, 2015 by ashleymelvin34

I have always had to learn how to learn around curve per say. Nothing has ever come easy to me, but that never stopped me from fighting for what I want and learning how to get it! The top five things that have made me the learner I am today would be when I lost my grandma, when things went bad with a boyfriend and I found my husband, when I had my son, when I failed a class and when I worked three jobs to support myself and school!

My grandma was and always will be my number one supporter! There for a while she was really like a mother to me! Whenever I would do something good in school or get an award she was always the first one to praise me. She also always had my back. When I wanted to make honor roll, she was always up and ready to take me to school even when things were very dim in our family. I just recently lost my grandmother this last April and to this day I am still trying to learn how to cope with the fact thgrandma me jaydenat she is really gone! We talked every night about life, school and things that were new or different. I could call her at any time of the day or night and she would always answer. I have had to cope with a lot when she was alive as well. The day I found out she had kidney failure I could not stop crying for days. I knew that eventually I was going to lose her. The day that I found out she had liver failure, it was merely the same reaction. She then started having these blackouts and ending up in the hospital. I knew that none of this was going to end how I wanted it too. When I got that call that she was back in the hospital and it did not look very well, I did not hesitate to get on a plane with my son and fly home. I spent all weekend with her and my cousin surrounded by friends and family. We all-knowing full well what the outcome was going to be. April 7th a day that will always be engraved in my mind! The day that I lost my grandmother. It will never be the same for me ever again, I will never be able to make that phone call again or visit her with my son so she can see him grow. This whole experience has made me learn that life goes on when someone passes and that the love will always be matter. It does not mean they are not apart of your life because they will always be in your heart! This experience made me deal with DEPRESSION I was having and be able to turn it around.

I have alwawedding dayys been one to do things at the drop of a hat and never really think of the consequences. Well that ended me meeting guy that I had not known for very long and moving to Missouri with him. I thought I had loved him and I wanted to spend the rest of my life with him. After three years things quickly went sour and I needed a way out. His family was always in our business and he became abusive and an alcoholic. I was not the person to take things lying down, I fought back and finally found the strength to get out of a situation that could have ended very badly for myself in the future. That strength to leave him made me realize the person that I truly loved and wanted to be with the rest of my life was someone I already knew and loved! From this experience, I found my inner STRENGTH and am no longer afraid to use it!

The day that I knew that I could never LOVE someone else was the day my son was born. He really taught me wjaydens birthhat it was to give someone unconditional love! He was something I always wanted but just was not sure it was going to happen. I was told having kids may not happen with issues I was having but shortly after my husband and I got married I found out I was pregnant with our sweet baby boy! He was born on January 20th, 2013 and that is also a day that I will never forget. I love this little boy more than the world will know! My love for him will make me fight and encourage him to do things with his life. My love for him will also let him know he will always have a fan in this cruel and unusual world.

Photo CC-By Live Life Happy

Photo CC-By Live Life Happy

I am somewhat of a perfectionist and strive to always do things to the best of my ability. The first time I ever failed a class, I thought my world was going to end. Never in a million years did I think that I would ever fail anything. I always did my best and gave it my all. But come to find out everyone fails at something and mine just happened to be a class that I had a hard time in and could not pull myself out of the slump that I was in. This experience made me learn how to deal with FAILURE. This experience will always show me that it is okay to fail as long as you turn around and pick yourself back up!

Photo CC-By BK Original photo credit: Manfred Antranias Zimmer

Photo CC-By BK
Original photo credit: Manfred Antranias Zimmer

I have always been that person to do things on my own and never wanted help. I guess you could say that I had the PERSEVERANCE to make sure that my bills were paid, I had food, I had clothes and that I even paid for my things that I needed. When I was in high school and when I first started college I worked three jobs on top of going to school. Why? Because I knew that my parents had to afford things for my brother and I knew if I needed something I could get it on my own. This experience keeps me grounded knowing that if I want or need something done I have the perseverance to do it and keep moving forward.

We all have those life changing events that make us open our eyes and realize and learn things and some times you may have a hard time learning such things like I did. But what I realized it was okay to learn differently than others and it was okay to stand out from the pack. I like to call it learning around the curve. I do things my own way and my own pace! That is okay with me because in the end I know that it will always have a greater outcome!


10 comments on “Learning around the Curve!

  • Hi Ashley,

    Your wedding picture is beautiful and your little boy is adorable! You’ll be beating girls off of him for sure! 😉

    My grandparents are all gone now, so I’m with you on the death of a grandparent. I’m sure you’re glad that you have a picture your grandmother and son, it’s a treasure.

    It sounds like you have quite a few of life’s “greatest hits” under your belt already! Welcome to the life-long learning club. Your strength will be challenged over and over, and the learning curve is still steep because every situation is different. Fortunately, you’ll have some experience to fall back on, and as you said, it’s about how you RESPOND. Don’t forget to lean on your hunny bunny for support, and delegate whenever possible! Breathe.

    Enjoy each and every chapter of your “Great Adventure!”

    Vicky D
    Peanut Butter Theater

    Liked by 1 person

    • Thank you! We definitely had a fun and hectic wedding day! Ya I am scared what the future holds for my son and girls considering he already stares and tries to follow them. It is my absolute favorite picture of my son and my grandma! It was right before she passed away. It is definitely something to keep forever. Also thank you for all your kind words!


  • I really love your post about your Grandma. I nearly cried. WoW. I lovede reading about your triumphs and going through all you have gone through. Truly amazing and inspiring. It is nice to know that other people struggle and can still manage to make the best of their situation. Congratulations on the birth of your son! It is so refreshing to see that you are still moving forward. I was truly inspired while reading this post. Thank you for sharing 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

  • Ashley, Thank you for sharing about your joys and your trials. I lost my Grandpa on Christmas Eve a couple of years ago. That was the first person in my life I had lose in that way. I understand how hard that is. I am so glad that you were able to be there with her as you said your goodbyes. Thank you for telling us about the good that came from each situation!


  • I loved reading what you had to say about parenting and being a mom. There is nothing in my life as powerful or important as the love I have for my son. I learn so much from my son, from trying to be a good mom to him. In the years I’ve been teaching different Methods courses and working with pre-service teachers, I’ve noticed that many have a strong perfectionist streak, which can be problematic in the classroom. Teaching is a profession where our need for control (perfectionism) can get in the way of actually being good at our work.


    • That is one thing I am scared of, I strive for things to be perfect. So when I get into teaching and things are not going to be quite perfect, I may have a rough time for the first couple of months learning to deal with all the changes and messes as they come. My son is definitely my pride and joy!


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